Happy Valentine’s Day

Don’t sell yourself short. Never settle for less than you deserve. Most of all, love yourself. #thatisall

Much love,
Lesley. xo.

image

Thoughts on Valentine’s Day

So I’ve been spending the past few weeks exploring my own feelings on the gloriously love-filled occasion known as Valentine’s Day. Out of that exploration three questions come to mind that I have tried to answer for myself, but that I would also like to ask others:

1. Do you celebrate Valentine’s Day?

2. If your answer, was “Yes,” is it because you want to or because you feel obligated to?

3. If your chosen “Valentine” was not at all interested in Valentine’s Day would that bother you or would you view it as a huge relief?

If I had to answer those questions my response would be as follows:

1. Do you celebrate Valentine’s Day? 

My instinctual response to this question would be YES. However, I have been in a relationship where Valentine’s Day was not celebrated because my then partner didn’t want to celebrate it and so I forced myself to accept that. I was not happy about it, but I accepted it. The ironic thing about it though, is that in the early stages of that romance we celebrated Valentine’s Day together; I wasn’t even expecting to because as I said, it was very early in the relationship, but it was a pleasant surprise that I enjoyed. A surprise that I reasonably expected to persist should we stay together for future Valentine’s Days. It did not persist. I had been duped. 

2. Is it because you want to or because you feel obligated to?

I am what many would call a “hopeless romantic.” I love to love, I love to be in love, I love the demonstration of love, I love seeing other people in love, I love the different forms of love that can exist, I just love LOVE; so if there is a day that is going to be used to celebrate said love then hell yes I am on board. So…to answer the question, when I celebrate Valentine’s Day, yes it is because I want to. 

Would I still celebrate it if I didn’t really want to but only felt obligated to? 

My answer is still “yes.” If I was a different person than what I described in my previous paragraph, and wasn’t at all interested in Valentine’s Day, yet I was in a relationship with someone who appreciates the occasion and wishes to celebrate it, then yes I would feel obligated to celebrate it. Not the you’re-gonna-have-to-drag-me-kicking-and-screaming-to-the-restaurant-tonight type of obligation. But loving obligation, ie this is not what I am into, but I am into you, and if it is what you are into and it does not pose a danger to me and it will make you happy for me to celebrate with you, then because I love you (or like you a lot) I will do it for you. I often wondered (please note the use of the past tense) why my anti-Valentine previous partner couldn’t see it that way, but that’s the next girl’s problem to deal with now isn’t it?

3. If your chosen “Valentine” was not at all interested in Valentine’s Day, would that bother you or would you see it as a huge relief?

It would bother me but I’d adapt to suit (see response to question 1).

 

How would YOU answer these questions? Think about it, and see if it teaches you something you didn’t know about yourself!